Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Brown Wants Charity

Brown: "I want to get involved with Charity. God knows I'll need it."

Prime Minister Gollum Brown has said he wants to get involved with charities when he leaves office, rather than go on the more usual speaking tour.

Yep, I think that's about right. I can't imagine anyone in their right mind would pay money to listen to the discredited, monotonal ramblings of the wonky-jawed one, so that's the lecture circuit right out.

As for other employment prospects - well, I really can't see him with a bank directorship, can you? He'd sit on any bank's letterhead with all the positive presence of a turd on a bedspread - the man who broke all the banks, not just the one at Monte Carlo.

It's also reasonable to assume that the parsimonious, prudent PM [insert uncontrollable giggling here] managed his personal finances with the same finesse and skill that he used on the country's. So we can expect that he's been assuring poor Sarah that his bank balance has shown eleventy-million quarters of growth, and that his family is uniquely placed to weather his upcoming and inevitable career change much better than any other Prime Minister in history. What he means, of course, is that he's got an overdraft the size of the RBS toxic-debt book, all his credit cards are maxed-out and he'll have to sell his children to cover the debts next year.

Unbelievably, therefore, I actually agree with something Gollum's said. Just like him, I'm expecting that within twelve months of the General Election he will, indeed, be working closely with the charitable sector.

Chiefly Shelter to get himself a new blanket, and the Salvation Army for a nice warm mug of soup.

1 comment:

Pam Nash said...

I'd post something sensible, but I'm laughing too much :)