Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Friday, February 27, 2009

"Right", Said Fred

To the tune of the Bernard Cribbins classic.

"Right" said Fred, "I'm the bloody chairman
If RBS is fucked I'll have to go"
He went softly, gave up on his money
But he kept 'is pension
And so we had a media frenzy

"Right" said Fred, "Now I've quit the comp'ny
13 grand a week will have to do
Take it easy, no need to be thrifty
Coz I've got my pension"
And so we had a media frenzy

And Gordon had a think and he thought he ought to get the bank he'd rescued
To check they'd not been too screwed
But the Board all said they were happy to pay Fred

"All right," said Fred, "time to put my feet up
With my pension I've got loadsa dough."
Board had screwed up, media threw their arms up
Should have blocked his pension, but no!
So Fred said, "give me a massive monthly cheque."
The Board said, "right-o."

And Gordon had a think, and he said, "Look, Fred,
I'll give the job to Prescott
And we'll sue you for the whole lot
If you don't want flak you should pay your pension back."

"Right," said Fred, " Have to take you all down,
So I'll write and tell you where to go."
Prove the Gov'ment had approved the payment
So I'll keep my pension"
And so we had a media frenzy.

"Right," said Fred, pulling out a pencil
With one letter gave a mighty blow.
Board's in trouble, Myners prob'ly double, more of Labour's misdeeds come home,
But Fred's scot-free 'cept for on the BBC
And so we went home.


banned said...

Just perfect Dungeekin
Open in a new window if any forget the tune.

What was that about " Charlie "!

Last line " That's the trouble wiv' Fred; too 'asty, now you never get nowhere if you're too 'asty"

Wonderful stuf, thank you.

Anonymous said...

Bernard Cribbens would be so proud!