Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Sorry, Wrong Number

A woman has been taken to hospital from Tiger Woods' home in Windermere, Florida, today, following an emergency call yesterday.

The call was received at 1030GMT at the Headquarters of the London Ambulance Service - however it took paramedics twenty-two hours to book their flights, arrange airfreight for their ambulance, get round the M25 to Heathrow and get through security, before an eight-hour flight to Orlando and a 2-hour mercy dash on the freeway.

Paramedic Bert Eckythump said, "we did the best we could when we received the emergency call - we got there as fast as possible. It would've been a bloody sight quicker if the airport security guy had used a pair of my gloves for the cavity search."

A Government spokesman said that they were confident response targets had been met, and a spokesman for the Sun admitted that their editors and proofreaders were too stupid to use the headline '911 Call from Tiger's House'.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

At least they went to the right address. Knowing LAS, I'm surprised they didn't end up driving endlessly round Windermere in the Lake District confusing local landlords asking for directions to Tiger's house.