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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Urine-Spray Chemist Escapes Jail, Gets New Job

Sahnoun Daifallah, new Prime Ministerial Faeces-Flinger.

A chemist who contaminated food and wine in Gloucestershire supermarkets with his own urine and faeces has escaped prison today.

Sahnoun Daifallah, 42, of Gloucester, was found guilty of four counts of contaminating goods at four businesses in May 2008.

However, Judge Carol Hagen decided against a custodial sentence following character references and reports that Daifallah had been offered gainful employment.

Bristol Crown Court had heard the Algerian-born chemist sprayed a mixture of his own effluent in four locations including Tesco in Quedgley and Morrisons in Abbeydale. When police searched his house they found stockpiles of the mixture and plans to spread it in other cities including Bristol and Birmingham.

However, following references from Tom Watson MP, Derek Draper and the Prime Minister Gordon Brown, Judge Hagen decided against a custodial sentence.

Speaking after the hearing, Tom Watson said, "we do understand that Mr Daifallah did a bad thing. However, we feel that everyone deserves a second chance, and the Parliamentary Labour Party are going to give Mr Daifallah that chance to redeem himself.

Mr Watson added, "with Damian McBride gone the Labour Party needs to hire someone who can fling shit around, and this guy fits the bill perfectly".

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