Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Greenpeace: Jackson Death 'A Tragedy'

Environmental activists have reacted with shock and sadness to the announcement today of the death of Prince of PaedoPop Michael Jackson.

Speaking to journalists this morning, TreeHugger Sandalrecycler, Greenpeace Chief Executive, said, "we at Greenpeace are all shocked and saddened at this tragic news. It is a sad day for the world as a whole".

Mr Sandalrecycler explained, "the saddest part is the environmental impact that the death of Mr Jackson will have. He can't be buried, because we estimate that over 70% of his body is now non-biodegradable. It's the equivalent of putting over three thousand plastic bags in landfill, he would take two thousand years to decompose. Cremation is also right out, due to the risk of carcinogenic gases and the high carbon content of the Prince of Pop's skin. His death is an environmental calamity".

In a related development, Sellafield-based company BNFL said that they were tendering for a potential contract to reprocess the more toxic materials in the star's body.


Brennig said...


Anonymous said...

You owe me a new laptop keyboard.

nuttycow said...


Harriet said...

"But his music was something special,"

So is a broken leg, or piles.

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banned said...

"It's my burial today, you can all come if you want to".

Dead Michael