Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Celebrity Love Shock Split Triangle Shocker!

Back together again: and she's brought him flowers.

The celebrity world was reeling in shock today following the announcement that Nicky 'Jordan' Clegg, who shot to fame when she came third in talent show 'Britain's Got Votes 2010', sensationally dumped veteran boy-band frontman Gordo Brown just a day after publicly declaring their shared affection.

Sources close to Miss Clegg confirmed the acrimonious split this afternoon, and it is believed she is to rekindle her on/off relationship with method actor Davey 'Faceman' Cameron, who recently overcame poor reviews for his performances in Star Trek: DS9 to lead his cast to glory in the Westminster play 'A Time For Change, Honest'.

The two had originally separated just 24 hours before, after the news broke that Miss Clegg had been having secret trysts with Gordo behind Davey's back. It was widely expected that Nicky and Gordo were preparing a shock announcement of their engagement - however it now appears that Miss Clegg has returned to her original fiance.

A spokesman for Miss Clegg said, "I just couldn't handle it. Gordo's lovely, and when he makes his promises they really sound genuine. But marrying Gordo means marrying the rest of his band, and everyone knows it's Pete that calls the shots. I've got to do what's right for me, and if I want stardom I'm only going to find that with Davey."

Gordo, whose boy-band Nu Layba shot to fame in 1997 before a disappointing set of performances led to their decline from popularity in the last decade, shrugged off Miss Clegg's words, saying, "I binned HER, innit, coz she's a slag and she's like been with Tories and that. And she's frigid." He is reportedly being comforted by bandmates Pete and Ed at his London home.

Nu Layba are widely expected to announce their own split within the next few days.

Davey Cameron has stayed out of the public eye since the announcement was made by his girlfriend, however a close friend said that he was delighted Nicky has returned to him. The friend added, "Davey always knew she'd come back. There's no way Gordo will ever get his Cleggover."

PR guru Max Clifford was unavailable for comment, as he doesn't want to have anything to do with the power-and-publicity-hungry bunch of vultures.

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Pam Nash said...

LMAO! Carry on! :)

Dippyness. said...

Excellent. Bet Blair's a happy bunny though :0)

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