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Wednesday, May 20, 2009

New Speaker Election Process Announced

The Judging Panel in rehearsals, interviewing Vince Cable.

BBC Television have announced that the election for a new Speaker of the House of Commons is to be fully televised.

Announcing the move, BBC Director-General Mark Thompson said that the plan would bring 'a new transparency' to the electoral process, and would help engage younger voters in politics.

The new programme, tentatively titled 'Britain's Got Order, Order' will be presented by Richard Hammond and that lanky twat who fronts 'Beat the Star', with a judging panel comprised of Simon Cowell, former Speaker Michael Martin and BBC Political Editor Nick 'Toenails' Robinson.

As well as the normal skills required of a Speaker - proceeding in a reasonably straight line at 2pm, mumbling 'Order' as required and troughing vast quantities of expenses, the new Speaker will have to demonstrate additional qualities, such as the ability to sing Prayers before the House sits, or to express vote results through the medium of contemporary dance.

Mr Thompson said, "this is a great day for politics, as the programme will make the Parliamentary system more accessible to the youth demographic. We feel that MP's auditioning for the role of Speaker, to be decided by a telephone vote, is the perfect way to bring Parliament into the 21st Century".

However, Mr Thompson denied that there was to be a BBC2 show titled 'BGOO: You're In The Lords', where failed auditionees would be interviewed by Adrian Chiles, saying, "that's just silly".

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