Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Monday, November 24, 2008

A Cunning Plan

So General Melchett-Brown's latest gimmick - a new, higher higher rate of Income Tax - is, in my opinion an absolute work of genius, though not for the reasons you may think.

(Note - this isn't Captain Darling's idea. He's merely the mouthpiece for the Clunking Fister).

Great idea. Melchett. Let's just analyse this shall we? Imagine for a moment that my current salary is £160k p.a. Once this new tax rate is implemented, surely the first thing I'm going to do is get on the phone to HR and ensure that my salary goes down to £149,500 with the balance made up in equity or some other non-taxable benefit?

I'm ignoring the VAT cut, for the simple reason that this has about as much chance of revitalising the economy as I do of winning the Booker Prize.

No, the reason this is a work of genius (for them) is because it shows Labour are thinking of power - not now, but in 2015.

Think about it.

They know - they absolutely know - that come what may, they are going to get their pointless, spin-doctoring backsides kicked out come the next General Election. At that point, they're going to leave the new incumbents with staggering debt levels and no option other than harsh tax rises to ameliorate the problem.

They've also worked out that the average voter has the political attention span of a goldfish (witness the 2005 General Election) and so they can spend five years attacking the Tories for tax increases while conveniently ignoring who caused them in the first place.

They can then campaign for power in 2015 on a promise of saving Britain from the 'tax and spend policies of the Tories'. And they'll win.

Clever, eh? As cunning as a fox who's just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University.


Anonymous said...

I think you've been spending too much time in the company of Captain Blackadder. :)

Dungeekin said...

Soph - one can never spend too much time in the company of Captain Blackadder.

The worthy gentleman's advanced and expert cynicism is a salutary lesson to us all.


Hedgewytch said...

Yikes ;o( could be.
Hey there is no such thing as too much time in the company of BlackAdder.
He was a genius of his times

Anonymous said...

you spotted that particular hot potato as well then. We should be deploring the move and kicking up a fuss insisting that if they want to make a tax enema then they should be the ones to sit upon it.

Anonymous said...

"hey are going to get their pointless, spin-doctoring backsides kicked out come the next General Election."

Not so fast, mate. Have you checked the opinion polls recently? Tory lead down to 1%?

Election February 2009, Brown to win.

Put money on it.

Dungeekin said...

Dear 'Anonymous'

Thanks for your comment.

It rather seems like you're looking forward to another five years of Thr Brown Regime, so perhaps you'd like to rebut my Post in a little more detail?

- Please show your workings, especially as to how a single poll showing 1% (when most others are showing up to 11%) guarantees Labour a win in the next GE:

- Please elucidate on what policies have been successful for Labour, paying particular attention to tax and economic legislation introduced since 1997;

- Please elaborate on what possible benefit a labour 4th term would have on anyone other than benefit claimants?

I look forward to your responses, as there's a real dearth of good British comedy, and I could certainly use some material!