Full guidance aimed at clarifying what factors might mitigate against someone being prosecuted for helping another person to die is due to be released today.
The PM is known to be against assisted suicide, and in an impassioned article in The Telegraph yesterday, he warned of the risk that legalising assisted suicide would pose for 'the weak and vulnerable in society, especially me'.
However, his position has been undermined by members of the Parliamentary Labour Party, who have pointed out that if assisting those in a terminal state to end their lives were legal, they could do what was needed to do and smother the embattled PM with a pillow. One source said, "In the case of someone who has no dignity, it should be right to end this terminal decline and rase the pain he's causing us and the country. We need clarification and confirmation on what is right, and what we can get away with. We can see that he has reached the end of his useful life, and it would be best if we can just do the deed and not face any comeback. It would be a mercy for him, and for all of us."
Rumours that senior backbenchers have clubbed together to buy Brown a one-way ticket to Switzerland remain unconfirmed.
The suggested action by the backbenchers has been condemned by Keir Starmer, the Director Of Public Prosecutions, who pointed out, "while I can think of nobody more deserving, much as they might wish to, ending the terminal decline of Gordon Brown would still be prosecutable. While their case could be mitigated by acting out of compassion, an additional element is that the assister must be a close friend - and Gordon doesn't have any of those.
"That said, I doubt we'd find a jury in the land who'd convict."