There was Alexander 'The Great' who when he saw the breadth of his domain wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer. Calamity Jane, the heroine of the plains. Erwin 'The Desert Fox' Rommel, the wartime tactical genius. Margaret 'The Iron Lady' Thatcher.
And let us of course not forget Lancelot Brown, who was named 'Capability' out of respect for the grandeur and brilliance of his garden designs.
So, in honour of the man, perhaps it's time for a new nickname for Gordon Brown.
For ages I've been calling him Gollum, in recognition of his vice like grip upon the 'Precious' for which he lusted so long. But I think that needs to change.
Henceforth, I suggest that John Gordon Brown be renamed 'Colostomy' Brown.
After all, there's no denying it captures the essence of the man - he's a useless sack of shit.