THE DIARY OF A GEEK IN OXFORDSHIRE


Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Dr Evan 'Twat' Harris MP

WARNING - CONTENTS CONTAIN RANTING, VITRIOL AND SWEARING

Twat. And scruffy too.

You know, I've always thought that my Member of Parliament was OK. Obviously he's a Limp Dumb, and thus a complete nonentity, but other than that he seemed pretty inoffensive really.

Until today.

Dear Reader, please allow me to introduce Dr Evan Harris MP, who seems to have suffered an unfortunate Prioritiesectomy.

Amidst all the issues weighing heavy upon the people of this great Nation, what is the priority of Dr Harris MP?

Evan Harris, a Liberal Democrat MP, said: “All parties in the House had agreed that discrimination against princesses and Catholic spouses is not justified, and that the language in the Act of Settlement is offensive.*

“All Gordon Brown has to do is to consult Commonwealth Heads of Government so that we can get rid of this discriminatory symbol at the heart of our constitution. It’s hard to believe that countries like Canada and Australia would demand that discrimination against Catholics and women continues.”

Listen, you ineffective, incompetent imbecile. I am a taxpayer who pays YOUR £64,000 salary, expenses pot and mink-lined pension plan. I pay you to act as a fucking MP, not a documentary fucking historian.

It's hardly surprising that a document drafted in 1700 doesn't meet your Grauniad-reading needs for political correctness. There are probably a million things you could be doing to earn your Parliamentary salary, rather than wringing your recycled sandals in ineffectual outrage over the discriminatory language in a 300-year-old historical document which, to be brutally honest, nobody in this country could give a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut about. HM and Phil The Greek are pretty much there to stay anyway, and after that the succession's sorted for a good couple of generations. So unless Charles becomes a fucking Hindu or something, it's hardly an urgent priority for Parliamentary time, is it?

And I shouldn't think the 'Princesses and Catholics' really care about your right-on solicitude anyway, because even if they don't get the top job, Crown, Orb, Sceptre and all that, they still make a fucking good living off the Civil List, earning a great deal of money for not a great deal of work. Sort of like a Member of Parliament really, only less of a pointless parasite.

So, Mr Harris, get of your limp-wristed Limp-Dumb hobby-horse and try doing your fucking job. You're paid to represent your constituents - all of whom have bigger things to worry about than whether the next Consort's a left-footer - and to hold the Government to account. Given the current parlous state of the economy, a collapsing NHS, a rising death toll in Afghanistan and 2 million kids in failing schools, you've got plenty of choice actually to do something worthwhile.

Fucking hell, it's no wonder people have given up on politics.

Twat.

*emphasis mine.




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11 comments:

Anonymous said...

So you don't mind a piece of legislation openly discriminating against Catholics remaining in existence then? Is the man not allowed show some sentiment?

Dungeekin said...

@Anomymous:

Nope. I couldn't, quite frankly, give a toss.

As I said, it's about PRIORITIES. There are many current priorities. Redrafting a 310-year-old document is not really one of those.

Thanks for playing.

D

Mr Rob said...

He looks like one of DI Regan's narks in the Sweeney. Where did he get that fucking tie?

Move away from the mike, son, you're nicked!

Ross said...

I think it's an outrage that the Papacy is reserved for Catholics and hope that Dr Harris can address this pressing point next.

banned said...

As you say DK, bit of a non issue until William is dead and unless Harry produces a girl sprog before a son.
Heir and a spare and all that.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7967142.stm

Sidsid said...

It is appalling that we have people "in power" whose mental capacity is so limited that they even recognise religion.
It is, after all, like politics, just a belief system.
The Bishops, Popes and clerics live off the fat of their believers, just as Ministers and MPs do.

Brennig said...

It's simple. We look at which MPs are getting in to a lather over this and chuck them out because they don't have sight of the prioritised ball.

Anonymous said...

Should he not tell us if he is a Roman Catholic and if so declare a vested interet

Brian E. said...

Are we expecting a sudden epidemic of something> Is the swine flu far worse than expected? Unless there is some unexpected high mortality rate amongst those in line of succession, what is the point as anyone who might be affected by this change would be way down the succession list.
Or is the real reason that some of the other clauses in the act, such as those restricting who able to sit on the Privy Council, are politically incorrect in the “Liberal” environment?

Anonymous said...

Actually, Evan Harris is not a bad fellow. He helped me when I was seeking planning permission for extending my house. And for me this had quite high priority.

Anonymous said...

Dr. Harris is far from being a Catholic or Christian of any kind. His origins are Jewish and he is a VP of both the Dawkins & Co. Humanist Association and also the Gays & etc. one. Google it! He is far more concerned to Raise the Gays and egalitize the believers.