....and the Home Counties cricket club forced to change its name from 'Crusaders' to 'Panthers' following complaints...
It's become clear to me that it's now possible to be offended by just about any word, regardless of subject, context or intent. Many people now, it seems to me, seek to be 'creatively and aggressively offended'. They are looking for words, whatever their use or context, about which to scream their rage and, in doing so, garner attention for themselves and further hamper the freedom of language for everyone else.
Words are just that. Words. They are the building blocks of language, yet alone they mean nothing. It is only by the application of context that words become something more.
So, given that everyone else seems to be doing it, I am proposing my own changes to the dictionary, in order to remove those words that people may find repulsive and offensive.
The term 'Labour' clearly refers to the Labour Party, who are sleaze-ridden, poorly-led and have bankrupted the country. The word is to be proscribed in all instances.
I personally find organised religion abhorrent. Therefore, the word 'christian' offends me. All children named 'Christian' are immediately to be renamed in a less offensive manner.
The use of the term 'child' denigrates young people, and is therefore offensive. All use of the word to cease, replaced instead by 'young persons'. Oh wait, this one's already been done.
Initially meant to refer only to a colour, the term 'brown' has been twisted into both a racial slur and, appallingly, now refers to the Prime Minister. As the very sight of him makes me physically sick, the word 'brown' is now banned.
This is a possessive term, implying ownership, which may cause offence to the homeless and to the recently repossessed. Therefore, it should no longer be used, but should be replaced with 'evil symbol of capitalist greed'.
This sexist word denigrates toy mannequins with female characteristics, and must therefore be removed from the lexicon. It has also recently become associated with 'Dolly' Draper, and is used as an offensive term to refer to a rabid left-wing propaganda merchant. Banned.
An archaic term, implying responsibility for one's offspring. As the State now has full legislation in place covering young persons, the term is no longer applicable and may offend those who are unable to conceive. To be removed from the dictionary and replaced, in all instances, with 'responsible adult carers'.
8. Simon Cowell
Offensive, insulting and poorly dressed. Should be summarily executed and expunged from the records.
I will be making the necessary changes to the OED over the next few days - does anyone have any other suggestions? I'll add them to the list.