50 Ways New Labour's Conned Us

(To the tune of Paul Simon's '50 Ways to Leave Your Lover')

The problem is all in Downing Street, it seems to me
The answer is easy, if you look then you will see
That Gordon Brown has wrecked our whole economy
There must be fifty ways New Labour's conned us

It really saddens me to see how much we're screwed
And furthermore, I hope my meaning wont be lost or misconstrued
But Ill repeat myself at the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways New Labour's conned us
Fifty ways New Labour's conned us

They invaded Iraq, Jack
Troops killed in Afghanistan
We'll be unemployed, Roy
And on CCTV
They've sold off the gold, Gus
They've spun and misled us!
They've wrecked the economy
And made us less free

Just invade Iraq, Jack
Troops killed in Afghanistan
We'll be unemployed, Roy
Just listen to me!
They've sold off the gold, Gus
They've spun and misled us!
They've wrecked the economy
And made us less free

It grieves me so to see our country in such pain
I hope the Tories do whats needed to make us smile again
But in the interim, just let me please explain
About the fifty ways

Why don't you think it through and sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning you'll begin to see the light
When you consider it, you'll realise I probably was right
There must be fifty ways New Labour's conned us
Fifty ways New Labour's conned us

They invaded Iraq, Jack
Troops killed in Afghanistan
We'll be unemployed, Roy
And on CCTV
They've sold off the gold, Gus
They've spun and misled us!
They've wrecked the economy
And made us less free

Just invade Iraq, Jack
Troops killed in Afghanistan
We'll be unemployed, Roy
Just listen to me!
They've sold off the gold, Gus
They've spun and misled us!
They've wrecked the economy
And made us less free