Sarah Shourd, 31, Shane Bauer and Josh Fattal, both aged 27, were jailed for illegally entering the country in July while trekking in mountains on the border with Iraq. Iran's foreign minister told reporters the Americans were still in custody and would face charges.
"We are continuing to interrogate the three infid...sorry, Americans, and we expect to charge them shortly with Possession of a Shit Excuse", Manouchehr Mottaki said.
"I mean, seriously, does the Great Satan think we fell off the back of a camel yesterday? They just happened to be 'hiking' in a war-torn country, and just happened to 'stray' over the border into a nation hardly renowned for its positive interactions with theirs?" he added, making exaggerated quotation-marks with his fingers.
Mr Mottaki refused to be drawn on what other additional charges may be brought against the three Americans, but did add that the fact that one of them was called Bauer was grounds for additional suspicion.
The US State Department and the Central Intelligence Agency have denied any knowledge of, or involvement with, the three hikers. Which is to be expected.