The outcry over the lack of non-white characters in the popular series has led the producer, Brian True-May, to confirm that he would make significant changes to 'reflect the multicultural nature of small English villages'.
Speaking to an emergency meeting of the Commission For Racial Equality, he said, "I don't want people to think I'm racist at all. I'm not, and obviously some of my best friends are ethnics. So I plan to bring the viewing public my vision and experience of the multicultural Cotswold village in future episodes."
Mr True-May added, "I will bring to bear all my knowledge of black and ethnic-minority culture to the series, and in doing so I believe I'll dispel these accusations of racism in the Midsomer world."
The upcoming series, which is to be co-produced by Jim Davidson, will see the character of DCI Barnaby replaced with a wisecracking Rastafarian detective who wears a big striped hat and says, "Ooooooooooooookay" repeatedly. Rumours that the character may be played by John Nettles in blackface remain unconfirmed.
Midsomer Norton is to be replaced by Midsomer Projects, a sink estate with rampant gun-battles between police, Crips and Bloods overspilling into the peaceful surrounding villages which are of course solely occupied by white, upper-class families and their servants.
Upcoming plots are said to include a series of mysterious murders over crack-dealing territory in Newton Magna, a riot during a rap battle at Ford Florey Village Hall, and the shooting of the Asian shopkeeper by a gangbanger in Morton Shallows.
In other news, producers of 'Neighbours' confirmed that they were considering cast changes to offset complaints that non-Australians were under-represented, and US hit show 'The Fresh Prince' will be banned from all UK terrestrial channels.
The Diary has learned that Equalities Minister Theresa May is to make an Emergency Statement to MPs on the issue of under-representation of ethnic minorities in a not-very-good TV crime drama, because of course there is nothing more important going on anywhere in the world right now.
4 comments:
Superb! :D
Theinnacle of stupidity! I am Russian, my wife is Russian... Her reply was "I could not care less in the slightest" whether there were minorities in the cast or not... I am watching it for the story lune and the mastery of the play, not for whether minorities are satisfied that they represened equally in an episode... The talent of the cast that what makes English tv drama to stnd out...give me a break!
I am so disappointed that you are to change the cast. I am an American loving the character of John Nettles in Barnaby. What a sad day that you will not keep the special chemistry that he brings to the role.
So sad we were watching this on Netflix and noticed how the episodes are much more gruesome and terribly not charming at all. It's little too cool for school as I like to say. We miss the old charm of episodes prior to producer and main actor switch. The new Barnaby is kind of too much middleclass and not at all English village charmer. I think the new producer totally misses the point of what this show meant to the world, all cultures. I even noticed that in new episodes a lot of times there are mean statements towards religions and atheism is promoted as cool. Why such darkness in new episodes?
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