In a statement released this morning, a spokesman for the office of President Knickerless Sarkozy said, "France has a duty and a responsibility to meet its international obligations, and to maintain its worldwide diplomatic presence. We recognise the bravery and determination of the NLC in staving off the yoke of Gadaffi's oppression, and their courage in taking up arms for freedom."
"The Government of France therefore announces its unconditional surrender to the National Libyan Council. Here, take my daughter. Just don't hurt us, please!", before running off to hide under his bed.
The French Embassy in Tripoli is now reported to be flying the country's traditional white flag, and negotiations are under way for the NLC, currently running eastern Libya from a garden shed in Benghazi, to take over the Elysee Palace in Paris.
The news is the latest in France's capitulations to Middle-Eastern democracy campaigners, and follows their recent unconditional surrender to a homeless Algerian with a big dog in Marseilles last week.
General De Gaulle was unavailable for comment.