Banality Rules the Airwaves

Occasioned by the reporting of a news correspondent leaving 'Strictly Come Dancing' as 'Breaking News'. . .

(To the tune of Rule Britannia)*

When Auntie first, at Reith's command
Arose and aired and gained it's name;
Arose, arose and aired and gained it's name;
This was the Charter, the Charter of the Beeb,
Their Governors sang this strain:

"Nothing crappy - just quality on the airwaves:
"Our job will be to inform and entertain."


But now we're inundated with banality,
And, on the air, the standards fall;
And on and on the air, the standards fall;
Ross, Brand and Strictly, reality TV,
And News that used to be the envy of them all.

"Fools, Britannia! You used to rule the airwaves:
"The Beeb is failing to inform and entertain."


So no more majestic shalt thou rise,
More dreadful, dreadful from each awful show;
More dreadful, dreadful from each awful show;
And all the drivel, you air before my eyes
Serves but to bring thy standards low.

"Bland, and crappy - banality rules the airwaves:
"We'll just shovel crap instead of entertain."

(*As if you hadn't worked that out.)