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Monday, April 26, 2010

Shock over Lib Dem 'Fakes'

Lib-Dem 'Leader' acting a part.

The Liberal Democrats have come under fire again, after it transpired that their 'party leader' was in fact simply an actor dressed up as a politician.

The admission comes just days after revelations that a 'police officer' seen talking to Welsh Lib Dem leader Kirsty Williams was in fact a fake, and that a 'nurse' pictured in a Lib Dem leaflet was actually an employee of a Welsh Assembly Member.

Sources within the Liberal Democrats have admitted to The Diary that so-called Nick Clegg, who has been appearing around the country and on television as the Lib Dem leader, is in fact a journeyman actor whose prior roles have included a cameo in Coronation Street and 'second corpse from the left' in an episode of Casualty. He was offered the role of 'Party Leader' after Vince Cable saw him play a particularly good Baron Hardup in pantomime in Twickenham.

A spokesman for the Liberal Democrats said, "the appearance of a leader is used for illustrative purposes to highlight our policies, and what action we would take in Government if we had a leader. In our election campaign, we are only using an illustrative leader to highlight how incredibly different we are from the other two parties. Honest."

The spokesman pointed out that the use of an actor as apparent leader of a political party was not unknown, given that everyone is aware Labour leader Gordon 'Colostomy' Brown is Peter Mandelson's glove puppet.

The true identity of the actor playing Nick Clegg remains unknown, though there are rumours that prior to auditioning for the role he was a Conservative Party activist. However, it is believed that he will end his season after polling day on May 6, in order to take up a supporting role in a Ray Cooney farce in Blackpool. His agent pointed out that 'in all honesty, it won't be a great deal different to campaigning for the Limp Dumbs.'

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1 comment:

Pam Nash said...

Excellent - apart from the last part. Clegg IS to be in Blackpool, but as warm-up for Roy 'Chubby' Brown; no prizes for guessing who's standing in for Brown............