THE DIARY OF A GEEK IN OXFORDSHIRE


Solving the World's problems with common sense and a flamethrower.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Life changes for the better

I used to believe that I only blogged - only actually wrote - when I was miserable.

For me, for the longest time, writing was a way to escape the things in my day-to-day life that made me so unhappy. I stayed glued to the news, puring my scorn and vitriol on anything that I could find.

Now - as the lack of posts here attests - I don't have that rage any more, nor the need to escape unhappiness.

And suddenly, over recent days, I've felt the urge to write again. The difference is that this time, my feelings are positive.

Last year, I made a hard decision and escaped the environment that was causing me pain. The fallout from that decision was painful in itself - not just for me but for others as well. And yet, 14 months on, I'm amazed and elated by the difference in my life.

I'm settled in a new relationship now - with someone who has brought me self-esteem and an inner equilibrium I've never really had before. She hasn't done this in a forceful way - just by being herself, and treating me the way she thinks I should be treated - yet in that treatment, she's created a calmer, more centred and happier me.

My parents and grandmother, who have dealt with the pain and fallout from my past life, have also been instrumental, as have friends - including one especially who, along with his lovely wife and beautiful daughter, welcomed me back as a friend when I had previously abandoned them.

For the first time in a long time - I'm happy. And I thank those who helped for it.

So. . . I'm going to try writing again. No negativity this time, no escape from pain and emotional torment - positives. Good stuff.

In other words - life.

1 comment:

Nik Butler said...

Cool, Welcome back Bro. We can also forgive you for working for the Sith Lords as well! Its great to see your bloggin up again ..